Luminous Tears

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I had been taught to never cry
and I stood there as the water dripped from my face
pools of it building up on the floor below
a painful sensation in the heart
wrenching in my gut
and then I realized
that by teaching me not to cry
they had given me the most powerful tears of all.

By Mikial
Copyright Oct 2013
All rights reserved.

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41 comments on “Luminous Tears

  1. i live in korea, usa, where men are only supposed to cry three times in their lives: once at birth, and once at the funerals of both of their parents (if they die simultaneously, i guess the son is only allowed to cry twice–sort of like having your birthday on christmas day). my life has become too subsumed by low-level depression for me to cry anymore, although i did make an exception the other day when one of my students gave a quiet, powerful, understated speech about her mother’s death from cancer. it felt good, and i remembered i should do it more often. laughter is also therapeutic–an orgasm for your lungs, if you’ll allow the analogy. thanks for liking my latest post. i look forward to reading more of your work. and apologies for the long-winded comment. i’m an incorrigible bloviator, i’m afraid.

    • I enjoyed reading your long response, you expressed your feelings and experience well and I found them very interesting. I grew as a child in an enviornment and family that is very Macho. Most of the men of my family were part of the military and my father was a boxer and martial artist. Crying was seen as a sign of weakness and not manly. I’ve never cried much due to my dad training me not to, it wasn’t until in my teenage years when my mother and father split apart that my emotions went wild and I could not contain my tears as I watched our family structure disintegrate , that was very difficult for me. However I feel that although It is very hard for me to cry because of the psychological blocks I have from my dad training me to not cry it is very liberating to do so when it happens. Thank you for such a great response my friend and I have now also been long- winded. Have a great day and hope to hear from you again in future posts.

  2. There is no shame in tears, Mikial. Glad you are allowing yourself to feel your emotions. There is actually scientific evidence that tears flush out accumulated stress hormones from the body and thereby help return us to a chemical (and therefore emotional) equilibrium.
    The military environment has its own testosterone-ridden codes. Maybe they work for combat situations but they certainly don’t do much good when guys get back home and don’t know how to deal with their PTSD and other emotional/neurological/spiritual issues resulting from their time in the service.

    • Thank you Annette for your kind words as well as the information you have provided. It is my hope that individuals who share a background such as mine are able to overcome the mental/social barriers that have brought them to an imbalance in emotions so they may come back into equilibrium as you have said. I am thankful & happy to know that people such as yourself are out there working to help others with their spiritual/mental & physical health. I am hoping that my work will help others as well. Take care kind friend & thank you.

      • It’s never easy to break the mould (as I suspect you did within your family and wider circle). But the price we pay for not being our true, authentic self is often much higher than the price we pay for being different from our family/social group.

  3. Really like this. Actually feeling inspired to write about an experience I had at the airport recently- the dad spoke similar words regarding not crying and not being afraid to his young son… Broke my heart and took some restraint not to intervene! Lol. You guys have it hard in that department. Thanks for visiting my blog and for the inspiration!

  4. I really enjoyed this poem. I had a conversation today with my mother regarding our lack of being able to cry. We find it strange because women usually don’t have a problem crying. I read a post I wrote March 2013 titled “When Tears Won’t Flow.” She was moved by it, as I was of yours. Blessings.

    • Thank you my friend, it is an honor to share such things through my poetry with wonderful individuals such as yourself. I often like to create beautiful poetry that helps the mind fly away to other places but I also equally enjoy sharing heartfelt poetry that is rooted in a reality. I hope you have an amazing week and thank you once again for commenting.

  5. Thank you for reading my poetry. Your Luminous Tears and accompanying responses inspire me to write of my father’s tears in front of me, age eight, and his drunken wife — my stepmother — and how I held onto my father as tightly as I could because I felt so bad for him. I have since had a very troubled relationship with him and when he died over two years ago I found complete relief, but that memory of the tears has remained with me forever.

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